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Joke of the Day
"If we all just agree that we're fine, we'll never again have to ask each other how we are."
Next Joke
"*standing outside your house I was totally going to stalk you but... *pets your dog instead"
"I hope I die alone. I mean, you'd have to be a pretty big jerk to hope others die with you."
"What do you call an upbeat and reasonable fortune teller? A happy medium."
"Positive people are less of a person They are missing electrons."
"Did you fall out of heaven? Because you look like it hurts."
"How did Helen Keller discover masturbation? Trying to read her own lips."
"What should the Packers call their cheerleaders? Green Baes"
"Just got back from my wild New Years Eve outing and shoveled my parents sidewalks. 'Cause that's the way middle-aged white guys roll. Yo."
"When I see a couple and the women's pregnant. I always walk up and YELL ""why don't you tell him who is really the father."" and walk away"