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Joke of the Day

"I couldn't find my mustache for a week It was right under my nose the entire time."

"Caught my wife cheating with the neighbor today so I smashed our big screen tv onto his head. That will teach them to prewatch the jeopardy dvr and try to outscore me without me knowing!"

"Jimmy: Khaleesi, of course means Queen. What's your real name again? Khaleesi (Kristen Wiig): Karen"

"Why couldn't Harry play basketball? Because he's got no arms."

"Why did Saul want to kill Christians? Because he was Saulty. I'll^show^^myself^^^out..."

"My school is having a best joke contest tomorrow... gimme your best All I got is How do you spot a vegan at a party? Don't worry, they'll tell you."

"Why couldn't the skeleton go to the Christmas Party ? He had no body to go with !"

"I'm a Poet... and I didn't even realise until just then."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? (Why?) To get to the idiots house."

"give a man a shoe and he'll be confused as to what he needs one shoe for. teach a man to shoo and you won't have to deal with his confusion."