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Joke of the Day

"I missed the lunar eclipse, but I've seen shadows before, so I get how awestruck everyone was."

"What was the point in making your car louder, bro? Do you really want women to turn their heads and notice you drive a 1999 Honda Civic?"

"What do Hillbillies do for Halloween? Pump kin"

"My love for you is like an hourglass I always finish on the bottom."

"What do you do when you drop your favorite ska record? PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP, PICK IT UP!"

"Apparently the Brexit is inspiring other countries to hold their own referenda, and could lead to the breakup of the EU. Could this be The Final Countdown for Europe?"

"Date: So, what are you passionate about? Me: Haha, have you heard of gravy?"

"A squiggly red line should appear under people who are wrong for you"

"If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame."

"I did my foreign country report on Ethiopia. It was really easy, I didn't even have to bring the class food."