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Joke of the Day

"What did the electrical engineer do when she found out that she hadn't won the lottery? She soldered on."

"Knock Knock (you say: who's there) I ate mop. (you do your part) I'll give you a while to figure it out. ...yes, it's childish."

"Yeah but how do misinformed people feel about it?"

"Why were all the rednecks sitting around an ordinary potato waiting for it to talk? It was a CommonTater I just made this up I swear"

"Just had a 9 minute argument with The Boy over why he needs to change his underwear this morning. Don't forget your birth control, friends."

"The wind is such a whore... ...it blows everyone."

"No officer, Vodka and I were hanging out and this car decided to join us."

"If God had wanted us to drink in moderation he wouldn't have put wine in barrels. #inspiration"

"What do you call a gay dinosaur? Tyrana**sore ass** Rex"

"A man told little Johnny ""I'll give you a piece of candy if you come in my van?"" Little Johnny replied ""I'll cum on your face for the entire bag!"""