163862

Joke of the Day

"I'm surprised more people don't Photoshop a cleaner house into the background of their pictures."

"I like my coffee like I like my minorities... ... I don't."

"Set a fire for a man and you'll keep him warm for an hour... ...set a man on fire, and you'll keep him warm for the rest of his life."

"How did Helen Keller break her arms? She tried to read a road sign going 45mph"

"[Bunch of 6 year olds knock on my door] ""TRICK OR TREAT!"" You kids are in for a real treat... *slips each of them a copy of my demo tape*"

"Feminism Nothing else. That's the joke."

"What's a bitch's favorite form of advertisement? A paw pup."

"Why didnt the asian block a punch coming to his face? He couldn't see it coming"

"There should be a sequel song about needing a ride back from Funkytown."

"fun drinking game: take a shot of water every couple hours to make sure you're healthy and hydrated"