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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who is both a taxidermist and veterinarian? He has a sign on the door that says ""Either way, you get your dog back."""

Next Joke
 
"2 Canadians are walking through the snow... The first one sees a boot in a nearby snowbank and says: ""Look, a boot"" The second one replies: ""About what?"""
"My daughter can be so cruel... Her: Hey dad, what is the difference between broccoli and boogers? Me: I don't know, what? Her (pointing at me): YOU, don't eat your broccoli!"
"How many members of the NRA does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More guns."
"One alternative to having kids is to hire two people to sit in your car and start a loud argument every time your favorite song comes on."
"What do you get when you mix pie and onions? Opinions!"
"My boyfriend said he wanted me to be more affectionate, so now I have TWO boyfriends."
"The part of the Harry Potter movies that I found most unbelievable was that mostly unsupervised teenagers never had wild keg parties."
"What did Treebeard say when he took a piss? RELEASE THE RIVERRR!!!!!!!"
"most recent posts on this sub Knock knock Who's there? /r/jokes /r/jokes who? Hahahahahaha!!!! it's an inside joke"