161004

Joke of the Day

"Let's call Trump the ""Second Place President."" He'll love that."

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"Staring at large boobs makes you better at multi-tasking. It demonstrates you can concentrate on two things at once."
"What was more important than the invention of the first telephone? The second telephone."
"Top 3 invisible things: 1) 2) 3)"
"I went to shake the old man's hand But Parkinson's beat me to it"
"Tom Swifty ""My mom is my dad!"" Said Tom transparently."
"Knock knock... Who's there? Dunup Dunup who?"
"I hate being bipolar, it's great"
"Henry David Thoreau walks into a bar. The bartender says: We don't serve your kind here! Thoreau replies: Walden. I'll see myself out."
"What distance say when velocity fell on top of him? Ow, this really hertz."