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Joke of the Day

"My dad just called because he was thinking of me & loves me. And THAT'S why I never danced on a pole. Well, that and I got too dizzy."

"""You are accused of polygamy"" ""And who pressed charges? ""Your wife"" ""Which one exactly?"""

"What do you get when you put a dinosaur and a bomb together? Dinomite!!!!! *budum tssst*"

"People were so scared of those vicious clowns a few months back, then they accidentally put one in office"

"I have a closet full of voodoo dolls created in the likeness of people I have seen with 11 items in the '10 items or less' checkout line."

"5 year old niece to me: What do you want to be when you grow up? Me: Let's not rush things, OK?"

"My head says ""go to the gym"" but my heart says, ""stay on the internet forever and eat!"""

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? One, but only if the light bulb wants to change."

"What kind of bagel did the camper eat? A winnebago."

"What do you call breads ability to smell? ... Naan sense!"