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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I take my pet skunk to department stores and let him spray himself all over the perfume girls."

"The weatherman keeps saying we are getting a pounding. *Followed*"

"A Limerick There once was a barmaid in Salles, On her chest wrote the price of ale. And on her behind, For the sake of the blind, Was the same information in Braille."

"[on a Speed date] pop quiz hotshot, if this date goes below 50 mph it explodes [her] that makes no sense [I mouth a tiny explosion sound]"

"""He looks just like his grandfather"" is a cute thing said about a new baby in most parts of the world. In Alabama,it's more of an accusation"

"Why did Dracula miss lunch? Because he didn't fancy the stake."

"What is the Cuban national anthem? ''Row Your Boat!''"

"What do you call a Mexican on a RIDING lawn mower? Promoted"

"I'm no gynecologist... But I can take a look."

"How do you make a 5yr old cry twice? When you rub your dick on her teddy bear."