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Joke of the Day
"What do you get when you cross a pig and a Christmas tree? a porcupine"
Next Joke
"I'm sorry I said the Nazis were also a party when you invited me to celebrate your kid's first birthday."
"I like my coffee like I like my wife... cold and bitter."
"so true story, i just mindlessly outstretched my fingers to graze the rear end of a Macy's mannequin that turned out to be a real human man"
"GUY (whose car died): can u help me? I need a jump ME (pulling a trampoline out of my trunk): im always prepared for emergencies like this"
"Was watching a fetish video and it cut to the guy at the last second I think I got off on the wrong foot."
"What is a chameleon's motto ? A change is as good as a rest !"
"the worst part about being vegan is having to get up early to milk the almonds"
"What do you call a group of armed nuns enforcing the status quo? a force of habit"
"My life sucks I've got a less-than-minimum-wage job, my best friend has no brain, my neighbor is an asshole, my boss is a stingy bitch, and the worst part... #I live in a pineapple under the sea."