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Joke of the Day

"A pedophile, a necrophiliac, a pyromaniac, and a zoophile walk into a bar. The bartender says ""Get the fuck out."""

"Kate Middleton's gynacologist is getting a Knighthood The amount of Royal cunts he's put up with he probably deserves it."

"My grandma thinks of me as a rock star... Always having me sign her tits. Takes forever."

"I tried telling a joke my friend from Baghdad told me. Unfortunately, Iraqed it."

"The past, present and future walk in to a bar... It was tense."

"What's an alcoholic's favorite novel? Tequila Mockingbird I made this up just now... I'm so excited about it."

"What do rocket scientists say about a task that is relatively easy? It's no social skills!"

"My 9 day old baby keeps chanting ""put the means of production in the hands of the workers"""

"I asked my friend in North Korea how he was doing. He said he can't complain."

"REPUBLICANS: I can't believe Trump won. DEMOCRATS: I can't believe Hillary lost. ME: I can't believe it's not butter!"