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Joke of the Day
"What kind of dinosaur writes poetry? A Bronte-saurus."
Next Joke
"me: siri tell me a joke siri: *turns on front facing camera*"
"What gets bigger every time I see my wife. My wife."
"I deliberately mispronounce 'quinoa' and then adjust the server's tip according to how condescending they are when they correct me."
"Why did Reddit's restaurant go our of business? All of its servers were busy"
"I love playing catch with my dogs when I'm drunk, because I don't have dogs when I'm sober."
"Wife still out of town. I'm afraid if I order Dominos again they will call child services."
"how do you know you're in an elevator with the people of reddit? you're stuck on the basement level!"
"Why did the funeral director cover his mouth? he kept coffin"
"What did the 2 say to the 3? Do you even, bro?"