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Joke of the Day

"I married a French girl and had three sons We named our first son Antoine. We named our second son Anteux. We named our third son Antthree."

"Violets are green, roses are blue... Alright you bastards, who fucked with the hue?"

"Trump's what you'd get if you poured a pot of glue, some glitter & a dog turd into your Build Your Own Hitler Kit and gave it a good shake."

"How many Trump protestors does it take to change a lightbulb? Doesn't matter. Trump protestors won't change anything."

"""pew, pew, pew!"" -me, pointing out seating options in a church"

"What do you call breakfast? Breaking fast yooo!"

"Did you hear about the pirate captain selling cheap corn? It was a buccaneer."

"What's red and fucks old ladies? Me, in my lucky red jacket."

"I've been using Vim for 5 years... Mainly because I don't know how to exit it"

"People with a sense of humour are so much easier to talk to and get along with."