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Joke of the Day
"What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics? Walking."
Next Joke
"I can't stand holocaust jokes, they hit too close to home. My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off one of the watchtowers"
"So They Cancelled Halloween In India This Year. They ran out of Ghandi."
"Fortune tellers I saw a fortune teller the other day. She told me I would come into some money. Last night, I fucked a chick named Penny. What are the odds?"
"I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid... ...but my parents told me the sky was the limit."
"Why did the blind woman fall into the well? Because she couldn't see that well."
"Why did the Hispanic become a mathematician? It takes Juan to know one."
"[desert island diary - day 1] 4:15 pm: Got one call out of my cell phone before it died. Now I wait. 5:25 pm: That pizza is definitely free"
"What do you call a deaf fishing boat captain? Anything you like he can't hear you."
"Stand way over there and let me tell you a funny fairytale. Once upon a time I ate all of your Halloween candy this morning."