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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a Jew and Harry Potter? One of them left the chamber alive."

"I understand exponents To a degree"

"seems like you must have been preeeetty stupid to get caught for murder in the 1800s"

"I tore the elbow of my shirt last week, but I was able to stitch it back together. On the hole, it's held up surprisingly well."

"Did you know that calculus was never taught in southern schools before the 1960s? They didn't believe in integration."

"Robin Williams It's a shame about robin Williams, but it's his own Damn fault. He should have listened to tinkerbell when she said ""think happy thoughts, think happy thoughts"""

"Despite all the hype, it was a mistake hiring a homeless personal trainer. I've been high in tent city training every day, but its not helping with my goals."

"The only thing i understood from Interstellar [spoiler] that the fifth dimension is a FUCKING BOOK CASE"

"What is the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean"

"I gave away all of my dead batteries Free of charge."