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Joke of the Day

"And God said to John, come forth and you shall be granted eternal life.. .. but John came fifth and won a toaster"

"What's the worst thing about a Ray Rice joke? The punch line."

"My psychologist said that I am losing my mind, and I don't agree. I'd say that my mind is losing me."

"Always a housemaid, never a house."

"Why did the blind lady fall in a well? because she couldn't see that well"

"Why does the pedophile like minecraft? Because he liked playin around all those miners."

"The difference between a tire and a black man... A tire doesnt start to rap when you put chains on it."

"Q: If a man's signature is called a John Hancock, what do you call a woman's? A: Historically insignificant."

"So a neutron walks into a bar He asks the bartender ""how much for drink?"" The bartender replies, ""For you, no charge."""

"You are dark and handsome; When it's dark,you are handsome."