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Joke of the Day
"Jared Fogle likes his subs the way he likes his women... 6 to 12"
Next Joke
"Where in the hell are Dora the Explorer's parents? Do they know she's riding a damn crocodile into a volcano?"
"Him: sex tonight? Me: Work put me in a bad mood Him: tomorrow? Me: I have a headache tomorrow"
"Gotye used to be popular. Now he's just somebody that we used to know."
"""When I think of you, there are some capital gains in my pants."" - sexy accountant pickup lines"
"There are three kinds of people... The ones who say the glass is half full, The ones who say the glass is half empty, And the one who thinks you should have gotten a smaller glass."
"I appreciate and am so thankful for all law enforcement officers ...until I'm driving."
"WAITER: the duck is organic & cruelty-free ME: can i order a duck who endured lots of cruelty WAITER: what why ME: a duck killed my father"
"Going to Forest Whitaker's house, but I can't tell if it's the one on the right or the left."
"What do you call a blind German? A 'not-see'."