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Joke of the Day

"We live in a time where ""He is hot"" is more important than ""He is a nice guy."""

"What's the difference between a thief who steals timepieces and a man at a strip club? One snatches watches and the other watches snatches."

"Why do artists never win when they play football ? They keep drawing !"

"I saw a murder today It was awesome. There must've been 50 crows in it."

"A real man will always find time for his woman, even if it means blowing off a date with his mistress."

"Yes, of course I love French films. Have you seen Rugrats in Paris?"

"Where do super-villains get their coffee? DUN-DUN-DUUUNNNNkin Donuts."

"If you're having second thoughts, you're two ahead of most people."

"GF: I think I'm gunna start a Twitter account Me: *whips head around* I'll help you set it up! *Grabs GF's phone and hurls it into the Sun*"

"Don't EVER let anyone tell you you're not worth anything. You can get at least ten grand for one of your kidneys."