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Joke of the Day

"Two peanuts walking down a street One was a salted...."

"Did you know there's actually 4 scientific bonds? * Ionic Bond * Metallic Bond * Covalent Bond * James Bond"

"An autistic and a vegan walk into a bar You only know because they mention it every other sentence"

"What country most despises cars that run on gasoline? Mad-at-gas-cars!"

"A robot had an accident and sustained a head injury. He was a bit upset."

"How can Rihanna tell when Chris Brown's cheating on her? The brand of makeup on his knuckle isn't hers."

"Down in Virginia, the prosecutors brag they could get a grand jury to bring a ham sandwich to trial. In fact, just last week, a banana was actually convicted of murder. It was overturned on appeal."

"What do you call a hapoy frog? Hoppy"

"What do you call a weird Russian? Off-Putin."

"If I had access to time travel, I'd use it to go back and cash in on some of those naps I was always refusing as a kid."