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Joke of the Day

"School joke Teacher: Whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: Who just threw that?! Boy: Me! I'm going home now."

"Two cans of Red Bull may give you x-ray vision, but five cans give you the ability to hear oxygen."

"What's worse than waking up with a boner? Realizing it's not yours."

"What do you call it when a spider gets a pimple? Arachne"

"Internet, just because I bought shoes from you once doesn't mean I'm going to do it again. You're coming across as desperate."

"Have you ever noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are ones you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place? There's such balance in nature!"

"Time Traveler and Bar's We don't serve your kind here, said the bartender. A Time Traveler walks into a bar."

"How did Kim Kardashian break the net? She sat on it."

"My husband's business is rather up-and-down - he makes yo-yos."

"A German installs a bath around his table Badumtisch"