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Joke of the Day

"How would you describe your past work? [Cut to me picking up coins off sidewalks and taking them to CoinStar] -Change management."

"How did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms"

"What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer"

"Why wouldn't the worker accept 10 fresh chickens as a reward for saving a farm on fire? It was a poultry amount"

"He died doing what he loved, forgetting to put my potato wedges in the bag."

"I've never dumped a girl. I always lay them peacefully in a field to be discovered by school children"

"Non-Americans may get this. Waterboarded."

"What do you call a sleepwalking Nun? A roamin catholic"

"If you can't handle me at my un-shaved, you don't deserve me at my waxed."

"What do a plumber and a walrus have in common? They both like a good, tight seal."