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Joke of the Day

"If you leave without a reason, don't bother coming back with an excuse."

"Sex with two is a twosome, sex with three is a threesome. Why do you think guys are called handsome?"

"I don't like the song Stairway To Heaven because it implies that heaven is not wheelchair accessible."

"A little demon came home from school one day and said to his mother 'I hate my sister's guts.' 'All right' said his mother 'I won't put them in your sandwiches again.'"

"A guy got run over by the PopeMobile yesterday. I guess he didn't see the sign that said ""Cross traffic does not stop."""

"I like my women like I like my coffee So hot I fill them with creme in 3 seconds"

"""my eye is up here"" -Illuminati pyramid"

"Why hasn't Mexico won any medals in the Olympics? Because all the Mexicans who can swim well, jump high and run fast are in the United States."

"What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest? Father Les. And yes, as a matter of fact, I am a dad."

"my mom should have been on one of the planes that crashed on 911 ... I think -Anthony Jeselnik"