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Joke of the Day

"If we stop neutering our dogs then the Terriers have won."

"Tequila If a guy gets drunk on tequila, and beats you up... then he's guilty of agavated assault."

"Doctor says I need to see a chiropractor for my back pain... I said ""Are you nuts? I don't have time to go to Egypt!"""

"[Dentist's] Me: *lying back with mouth full of cotton wool* Dentist: So what do you do? Equipment trolley 3ft away: I'm a ventriloquist"

"Why are ISIS so safety conscientious and choose to use donkeys instead of vehicles for transportation? vehicle tail pipes will burn your ass bad"

"Weekend My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend."

"If Linkin Park was to describe photons: ""[...] But in the end, it isn't even matter."""

"I went for a swim with my daughter... I felt a warm pocket of water in the waves and yelled at her ""Did you just pee in the ocean!?"". ""No"" she said ""the seaweed"" True story."

"What do you call a letter from a feminist? Hate male"

"One Hundred Metres to the Bus Stop by Willy Makit illustrated by Betty Wont"