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Joke of the Day

"Two rednecks are having sex -""Who's your daddy!! Who's your daddy!!"" -""You are."""

"My wife said that my pen!s closely resembles a Tic Tac. She was proud of her remark until I asked her why her sister still has bad breath then."

"Romeo and juliet is not a love story. It's a 3-day relationship between a 13 & 17 year old that caused 6 deaths. #readtheplay"

"Why can't a W-boson get a girlfriend? He can't even last a femtosecond!"

"I retweeted my boss to let her know that I know she's tweeting during the meeting."

"I've never dumped a girl. I always lay them peacefully in a field to be discovered by school children"

"Why did the Square divorce the Circle? It was sleeping around."

"What do grapefruit and vaginas have in common? The pinker the better and they're both an acquired taste."

"I start conversations with my children by saying ""Listen to me,"" to ensure they stop paying attention from the beginning."

"A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. "