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Joke of the Day

"I put the 'c**k' in 'puts c**k in anything'."

"Where did Saddam Hussein keep all of his CDs? In Iraq."

"All these knights going on a quest for the Holy Grail was a waste. They should've just asked their moms. Moms can find anything."

"if we know your religion, stance on gun control & how many kids you have just by looking at your car, you have way too many bumper stickers"

"In a communist country, what does a woman say to a man before having sex? I want you to seize my means of reproduction."

"Can someone help me decide which Nirvana album to buy? Wait, Nevermind"

"Why are none talking in the ladies sauna? They are sitting on their lips!"

"What do Harry Potter and Kermit the frog have in common? Hogwarts"

"Just googled ""sensible cars"" if anyone wants to share an applesauce cup with me at the retirement home."

"Leave the past behind. Smile every day. Never wear underwear. I don't know. Inspirational tweets are hard."