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Joke of the Day

"Women sex toys cost money for Batteries! Men's sex toys cost money for rent, clothes, groceries....."

"What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped"

"Me:[grabbing my guitar] i wrote this for you. Her: awww. Me:*pulls note out of guitar hole* ""we're out of cereal."""

"I asked my dad if I was adopted... He said, ""No, but not from lack of trying."""

"A car made of French bread just raced past me. It was a Baguetti Veyron."

"I like my women like I like my dick... ...kept in a dark place and taken out to be beaten every once in a while"

"Fat people just want to get into your pantries."

"Q: How do you know you're flying over Poland? A: Toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines."

"You can't be ugly and play hard to get, you are already hard to want....."

"The most effective way to torture young people is to make them watch old people use a computer"