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Joke of the Day

"The economy is doing really bad... Its so bad that when Bill and Hillary Clinton travel, they have to share a room."

"My friend died doing what he loved most... Heroin."

"I was watching a fight the other day... ...and a hockey game broke out."

"If I had a dollar every time a woman called me handsome... I would have one dollar... thanks mom..."

"You know you're not a Harry Potter fan if: you think a parcel-tongue is someone who can speak to packages."

"Worst place to buy condoms? A church. They're holy."

"Being a gentleman never goes out of style."

"I'm not self medicating myself with booze. The guy at the liquor store wrote me a prescription. Well he called it a receipt...whatever."

"What do you say to a girl with a black eye? Nothing. You already told her."

"Who was the most well rounded knight of Arthur's round table? Sir Cumference"