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Joke of the Day

"Three cookies were crossing the road when the first one was knocked down. What did the third cookie say as he reached the pavement in safety? Crumbs!"

"What's 3 inches long, stiff, and makes people laugh? My dick."

"Humans pretend to be smart but we still look at the ceiling when we hear a noise upstairs like we're suddenly gonna have x-ray vision"

"What do your internal organs call their dating life? Their homie-hoe-status"

"Why was little Jimmy fishing in the well? Because Tom had previously drowned in the well and everyone said ""Tom is sleeping with the fishes."""

"I think im gonna be a comedian Coz my life is a joke :"")"

"2 men walked into a bar The third one ducked"

"Yeah, I carry a gun. You got to. You never know when some lunatic is going to come up and say ... ""you're fired."" (c) Dave Attell"

"How do you get a jewish girl's number? You pull up her sleeve"

"Me: ..and a small sprite. McDonald's Girl: Want a large? All sizes are only $.99 Me: I ASKED FOR SMALL YOU DIABETES PEDDLER ok gimme a large"