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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between 9/11 and your birth? One was planned."
Next Joke
"Yes, I'd like to return this pizza ""is there a problem, sir?"" *opens box* ITS GOT NO TOPPINGS ON ""sir, you've opened the box upside-down"""
"this nation needs a monument dedicated to its teens. how about a giant middle finger carved out of a mountainside"
"I asked my German professor... ...""can you tell me how many credit hours of German this school offers?"" She replied, ""nine."" ""Well, thanks anyways,"" I said."
"What is the early 17th Century English word for having excrement and blood smeared on your forearms? fisticuffs"
"What does a Frog use to fish with? A TAD POLE."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Brendan ! Brendan who ? Brendan an ear to what I have to say !"
"I think it was stupid of David Bowie keeping his cancer a secret. The amount of likes he would have got on Facebook would have saved him ten times over."
"What's Whitney Houston's favorite kind of coordination? HAND-EEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEE"
"A city is only really home when you stop being mystified by its public transport system and instead are just constantly angry at it."