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Joke of the Day

"Have you ever wondered what would happen... if a virgin rooster layed a fertilized egg at the top of an infinite staircase?"

"I am a virtuous woman, that's why I cost more!"

"So I'm chatting to this 14 year old on the Internet.. She is funny, flirty, sexy and intelligent and now she's telling me she's an undercover cop, how cool is that at her age!"

"An 80's style montage of me and a dog learning to use chopsticks, and the dog progressing marginally faster"

"what do you get when you cross an insomniac, dyslexic, and an agnostic? Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog"

"What's a bear's favorite kind of treasure? Bearied."

"Not sure if this Adderall is working but I just made a pros and cons list about pros and cons lists."

"What do Ethiopians have in common with Yoko Ono? They both live off dead beetles"

"One zebra says to the other, ""I'm going to check out that patch of nice green grass over there . . . . . . I'll be white black."""

"Having trouble focusing because I watched a man use a key as a Q-tip on the subway today."