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Joke of the Day

"Why shouldn't you tell secrets on the farm? The corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beanstalk."

"How's a fart and a teenager alike? Because once you go to sleep, you can't trust either of them to not sneak out."

"That awesome moment when you flip your pillow over to the cold side."

"Did you guys hear about that guy that was stealing everyone's power? He's a real Joule thief."

"Botox doesn't make you look young, it makes you look like you think you're old."

"Pupil: My teacher was mad with me because I didn't know where the Rockies were. Mother: Well next time remember where you put things!"

"Who makes the music for the Marvel movies? The Avengers Ensemble."

"NPR is reporting terrorists are using twitter. I call bullshit. After logging on, most of us aren't motivated enough to get dressed"

"Why can't you hear a red heads footsteps Because they walk so gingerly"

"Canadian Army training is 6 weeks of learning how to throw a snowball."