114557

Joke of the Day

"Monocles Why should you never go out drinking if you wear a monocle? Because then you'd be a barnacle."

"When brains do it it the butt do they call it ...brainal?"

"Why do traffic lights turn red? You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!"

"To determine how safe a neighborhood is, divide the number of white women carrying yoga mats by the number of signs saying 'Checks Cashed'"

"What do you call a person who has sex with a person and a sheep? Basexual"

"Tried cleaning the house to the A-Team theme and ended up building a tank. So close."

"How many hipsters does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a pretty obscure number, you probably never heard of it."

"I like to go fishing from time to time... Just for the halibut."

"A blonde goes into a bank... ...to withdraw some money. The clerk asks her: ""Could you please indentify yourself?"" The blonde pulls out a mirror from her bag, looks into it and says: ""Yes, it is me."""

"While scrolling the front page I saw the most annoying thread ever It was coming out of the sweater I was wearing. That was my favorite sweater."