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Joke of the Day
"We should just rename television viewing ""watching Geico commercials""."
Next Joke
"Why was the pilot jealous of the chef? Because of his ground thyme."
"What does the horny scientist call a lobotomy? Getting head"
"Summer in Scotland. . . Is the best day of the year."
"Women... are like hardwood floors. Lay 'em right the first time, and you can walk all over them for the rest of your life."
"Hey Alaska wilderness show person who is about to freeze to death with no hope in sight, maybe just cuddle up with the crew filming you..."
"""I totally nailed that guy"" - Roman soldiers"
"You ever notice most Ford vehicle names are more fun when you put ""anal"" in front? Probe, Explorer, Excursion..."
"When my wife tells me to wear sunscreen and I refuse to listen, it shows that I am my own man who is badly sunburned."
"My dad told me that the future was in my hands Didn't know that the future was 9 inches long"