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Joke of the Day

"""Daddy, tell me again about how you wasted time before Twitter existed?"" ""Well son, we used to look at clouds & pretend they were animals."""

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"TV repair man..."
"You can say what you like about deaf people. As long as you are not directly facing them."
"Why do women put on makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad..."
"Woman without curves is like a road without bends.... You may get to your destination quicker, but the ride is boring as hell."
"We hate what we do not understand. I'm not really sure what that phrase means, but it's stupid!"
"I had an ant bite my penis today. it feels like a little prick."
"Did you hear about the amputee that came in last on Jeopardy? He was stumped."
"I'm worried I won't pass my stress test"
"I don't trust stairs They're always up to something"