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Joke of the Day

"No thanks CVS, I don't need a bag. I'll just wrap up my purchase in the 12 foot receipt you just gave me."

"How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None they just beat the room for being black."

"If there were such a thing as beavers that were small and live in people's circulatory systems, what would be their religion? Embolism."

"What is the difference between a wife and a mistress? The mistress says ""Oh darling! That was *wonderful*!"" The wife says ""Beige. I think we'll paint the ceiling beige."""

"Cargo shorts are awesome because you have extra pockets to carry all the ladies numbers that you get."

"What do you call an expensive circumcision? A bloody rip-off"

"Marriage If I answer a question and my wife isn't around to hear it, am I still wrong?"

"What do you call large number of cannibals stranded on an island? A *free-for-all-you-can-eat.*"

"What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros? Elephino \_()_/ "

"What does a redditer say when he reads a joke on r/jokes? We saw that same joke two days ago"