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Joke of the Day

"Why did the condom cross the road? Because he was pissed off."

"Why wouldn't the piglet's mother let her read romantic novels? She was afraid her daughter would run away with a wolf."

"Why did the blonde girlfriend's bellybutton hurt? Because her boyfriend was blonde too! Take a second. I'll show myself out."

"I can count on one hand the number of times I've visited Chernobyl... it's 14"

"Which purse runs from the law? Disburse!"

"I have such bad luck getting a girl to come over... I watched the video from ""The Ring"" and the creepy chick called seven days later and said something came up and she couldn't make it."

"I drank a pint of beer in Saudi Arabia the other day... ... It cost me an arm and a leg."

"I farted on the bus today and 4 people turned around. I felt like I was on The Voice!"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Flat out racism."

"Someday I'd love to treat my wife to some luxury items, like a BMW, a Louis Vuitton bag, or genuine HP ink cartridges."