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Joke of the Day

"Ranger Station BOSS: I have reports that you treat the wildlife inappropriately ME: No way *porcupine waddles by w/ kebabs on each quill*"

"What's yellow and smells of bananas? Monkey sick"

"Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar The bartender asks her ""why the long face?"" !"

"What comes after fear but before sex? funf"

"When I'm sick, I just remember my mother's sage advice: Feed a cold, starve a fever, and drown a soul-crushing depression in food and booze."

"Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel prize? Because he was *out standing in his field*!"

"I hope the guy who stole my debit card enjoys his $12 shopping spree."

"You have to give it to pedophiles They're the only ones who follow the speed limit in school zones"

"I want to see a pregnancy test commercial where 2 single people high five the shit out of each other because it's negative."

"Why did the DJ consider himself to be a part of the LGBTQ community? Because he was transitioning."