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Joke of the Day

"A woman ran out of toothpicks... Woman: Nanny! Why do we always ran out of toothpicks? Nanny: I don't know maam. I always return it after using."

"All these phone companies advertising for ""More lines, more savings!"" But when I do more lines my savings go to shit."

"I used to rub my hair together when I was stressed... But now I'm dreading the consequences."

"Today's laugh Every day I tell myself: ""Jack, you have to stop drinking"". Good thing my name ain't Jack!"

"I really wanted my kid to be a kid so I gave birth directly into the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's."

"Question: What's the major cause of divorce? Answer: Once is not enough."

"Online shopping. My wife was complaining that i shop too much online and that i had to send some shit back where it came from. So i have sent her back to Thailand."

"What do you call a sheep with no legs ? A cloud."

"What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese man on the telephone. Wing wing, halo?"

"Will Smith joke How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for fresh prince..."