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Joke of the Day

"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them."

"There are some problems in life that can be solved with chocolate....others require a full clip and a shovel."

"Why did the can crusher quit his job? Because it was soda pressing."

"I am not sure NSFW should apply here, because I am not convinced any one on twitter actually fucking works."

"The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."

"Where do Bees use the bathroom? At the BP station. (thanks grandma)"

"What do a hen house and OP's mom's mouth have in common? They're both more productive with a cock inside. Nsfw"

"If my grandmother was on Twitter, I bet most of her tweets would be about raisins."

"Every guy has a soft sensitive side. It's called ""I need to get laid and I'll say and do anything to"

"Just saw a redhead drinking Ginger Ale. It looks to be making him stronger. We must stop him before it's too late."