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Joke of the Day
"How do Germans tie there shoes? With little Nazis."
Next Joke
"[NSFW] Why did the lesbian couple travel through Europe? So the could fuck abroad."
"What's the difference between a cockerel and a prostitute? A cockerel says cock-a-doodle-do. Whereas a prostitute says any-cock-will-do."
"""Got any drugs or alcohol on you?"" ""yup, I'm all set. Thanks Officer"""
"My 4 year old refused his dinner but it's ok because I caught him eating a Milkbone earlier"
"Chuck Norris died yesterday. He's fine today."
"""Daddy, am I going to die someday?"" ""No, you're the only immortal being in the entire world. Goodnight, stupid."""
"You know what's a shame? A bus carrying lawyers and politicians going off a cliff and everyone on board dying. You know what's a damn shame? There was an empty seat in the back. Edit: details."
"*hands you a marijuana* ""This one's called Air Bud. It'll make you play basketball. Also it might turn you into a golden retriever."""
"I would be a terrible stalker because A) not motivated enough 7) you would always hear the rattle of peanut m&ms behind you."