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Joke of the Day

"What did one Casket say to the other Casket? ""Is that you Coffin?"""

"My favorite part of the Bible is where Jesus gives money to the rich, tells the poor to suck it up and asks for Caesar's birth certificate."

"If I had a shot of whiskey for every time I thought of you, I'd be sober."

"Why did the short guy lose the basketball game? Because he four feet."

"if you receive a mason jar at no cost.... does that make it a freemason jar?"

"Wife just shouted to me to get my big chopper out .After the panic subsided, I realised she meant we were out of firewood for the stove."

"*Reads about a Salmonella outbreak on lettuce -NEVER eats Salad again! *Reads about the dangers of Alcohol poisoning -NEVER reads again!"

"Whoever gets the gift from me that has scissors under the wrapping paper, I'm going to need those back."

"What's ET's first name? Spag."

"Why didn't the coffee and the tea get along? Because they were being ""brewed"""