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Joke of the Day

"I want to cover you in expensive things like gasoline."

"The recipe said ""Set the oven to 180 degrees,"" so I did, but now I can't open it because the door faces the wall."

"Cop: Know why I pulled u over? Me: Know why I pulled u over C: Stop that M: Stop that C: Wanna go to jail? M: Wanna go to jail? C: No.. errr"

"They should make a medal for anyone who uses a whole tube of chapstick before losing it."

"Sporks: the bisexual's favorite utensil"

"There are three kinds of people on earth Those who can count to three and those who can't !"

"How do you get a million dollars with a girlfriend You start with 4 million"

"Why did the dog's owner think his dog was a great mathematician? When he asked the dog what six minus six was the dog said nothing."

"I knew she'd been working at the foundry... because I smelter."

"A mind is a terrible thing to waste. Unless you're stupid. In which case, who cares."