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Joke of the Day

"What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken... I'll see myself out now.."

"Maybe we should put Obama on the $20 bill Then we would finally get the change he promised."

"McDonalds can't extend their breakfast hours because at 10:01am, the eggs become self aware."

"There are 2 hamsters in the airing cupboard, which one is from the Army? A: The one on the tank"

"When suffering from insomnia I either count sheep or ask my GF how her day was."

"Why should women only masturbate with these two fingers? *holds up middle and ring finger* Because they're mine!"

"I'm offended every time I talk to a stranger and I'm not offered candy."

"If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were on a boat, who would survive? Answer: America"

"TIFU by making an overused joke. Reddit"

"I heard jesus was a pretty gay guy cause he got nailed by soldiers"