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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a nut that eats other nuts? A pecan-nibal! Made this up at work while hungry."

"What room does a ghost not need? A living room"

"I got robbed by a magician Took my wallet, watch and every silver dollar I had behind my ear."

"Sticking a $5 bill into a vending machine turns it into my grandmother, dispensing stale snacks and rare dollar coins."

"Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her Head and Shoulders in the glove box."

"Q: What do pelicans eat? A: Anything that fits the bill."

"why did the spy cross the road because he never really was on your side hold your applause."

"A cowboy goes into a shop to buy condoms Cowboy: ""Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."" Cashier: ""Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"" Cowboy: ""Nah.. She's purty good lookin'....."""

"Some military humour: why do I call the ol' downstairs resident APFSDS? Because it's a long-rod kinetic penetrator!"

"When I'm old, I'm gonna giggle uncontrollably, squirm, and go all sack of potatoes on my son when he tries to get me in the car as payback."