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Joke of the Day
"Policeman: Why are you driving without a license? Motorist: Because it was revoked months ago."
Next Joke
"My parents asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I said I wanna watch. So they let me"
"The Republicans asked the Democrats what it would take to stop being considered stupid. The democrats said ""Just put forth one presidential candidate who can make a brain surgeon look like an idiot."""
"Teacher- ""How much is a gram?"" Me- ""Depends on what you want"" Teacher- ""Out, just get out"""
"*Runs 6 miles* *Adds Kenyan to resume*"
"What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 4."
"I heard there's a new Bread simulator game on Steam.. It's a great game if you're just loafing around."
"Two Snowmen are standing in a field. One snowman turns to the other snowman and says, ""Does it smell like carrots to you?"""
"What did the German physicist use to drink his beer? Ein stein. - From Big Nate, as told by my kid."
"[date slides her top down her shoulder to show me a scar] I got this surfing [I show her my grotesque balls] I was born like this I think"