42214
Joke of the Day
"I bet God's email spam box is filled with all the prayers from athletes."
Next Joke
"If you want her - tell her. If you need her - show her. If you yearn for her - touch her. Just make sure her husband's not at home."
"Accidentally pressed 2 for Spanish and Donald Trump's security team came out of nowhere to deport me."
"Judge: order in the court, ORDER IN THE COURT Me on the witness stand:*lips pressed against the mic* 2 hot dogs and a milkshake, your honor"
"don't kid yourself, the pace at which the cursor blinks before a blank space in a document is the actual heartbeat of God"
"Just remember, every time someone misuses the word ""epic"" Zooey Deschanel covers another Smiths song on her ukulele."
"Saw some snails fighting in my driveway... They were really slugging it out."
"Pigeons die when they have sex... Atleast the one I fucked did."
"The Lesbian couple next door... got me a Rolex for my birthday. I think they misunderstood me when I said ""I wanna watch."""
"What is Donald Trump's biggest fear? Mexican ghosts who can walk through walls."