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Joke of the Day

"Sleep with too many rich people and you can get Herpes"

"I crashed into the back of a dwarf's car... He got out, looked at the damage and said ""I'm not happy"". So I replied "" Which one are you then?"""

"Deep down, we're all that one lady in 7-11 with her bathrobe on."

"I'd tell you guys a pizza joke, but... ...it's cheesy."

"What does a lesbian pirate say? Scissor me timbers!"

"So my father-in-law asked me to give the Christmas prayer... Apparently Ezekiel 25:17 is ""inappropriate"""

"I used to have a problem watching internet pornography... but then I upgraded from dial-up to a cable modem."

"Why do Native Americans hate snow? 'cause it's white and all over their fucking land!"

"Good morning people.....I woke up feeling myself this morning....wait that doesn't sound right. What I meant is I woke up feeling confidant"

"A book just fell on my head. I've only got myshelf to blame."