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Joke of the Day

"This Halloween, the only Candy I'm interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues."

"Brother: Which is farther away- NY City or the moon? Sister: NY City. Why do ask? Brother: Well I can see the moon but I can't see NY City."

"What's the name of that German guy that keeps hiding my stuff around the house? Alzheimer, Grandma."

"Why can't Chihuahuas run marathons? They're short of breath!"

"Why is a doctor always calm? He got a lot of patients"

"Did you seriously hire a mentally unstable person to drive our kids just so you could say he's driving them crazy? Me as a principal: Maybe"

"My Ex-Wife still misses me BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!"

"How does a train eat? It goes chew chew"

"How do jews get around town? On penny boards."

"A chemistry joke. Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve noble gases in here."" Helium doesn't react."