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Joke of the Day

"Why was the little boy unhappy? Because he had a frog stapled to his face"

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"I can totally keep secrets. It's the people I tell them to that can't."
"I was raped by mimes They did unspeakable things to me"
"I'm 97% sure President Reagan would be riding a horse through the Middle East right now punching terrorists in the face."
"A black man and his donkey walk into a bar.. The bartender says ""get your black ass outta here."""
"What's the difference between The Rolling Stones and a scottish shepard? One says "" Hey you get off my cloud"", and the other says ""Hey McCloud get off my ewe!"""
"The Canadian Army"
"Doctor says my kid has some form of hereditary ADHD He explained it to me, but I didn't really listen."
"Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Fo Drizzle."
"A pig with a cold is called... pigachu!"