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Joke of the Day
"Did you hear about the kidnapping at the local school? It's okay, he woke up."
Next Joke
"Good job on the speed traps, cops - How are the getting murdered traps coming along?"
"There once was a girl named Roofie... Her blowjobs were really quite toothy. I slipped her a pill, She sucked on my dill, And ended my sexual thrill."
"I was throwing banana peels at other cars because I'm out of turtle shells, officer. Duh."
"""my god, that man is trying to snatch her purse!"" i'll be RIGHT back *ducks into phone booth* *pops head out 5 mins later* is he gone yet"
"What do you call two Mexican firefighters? Hose A and Hose B"
"What does a Vulcan lawnmower need to function? A spock plug."
"Why did the chicken cross the road? He cannot comprehend the concept of a road. He is just looking for food."
"""No pressure, but my happiness is totally dependent on you."" - soulmates"
"Life is like a box of chocolates. I don't have a box of chocolates."